The World?

riceslut:

I GOOGLED EGG PHOBIA AND

(Source: chickenstripgoddess)

thats-slightly-raven:

My milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard. GRAVEyard hahaha enjoy that cyanide milkshake you piece of shit.

Sex is so weird like hey I love you let me stick my hard extra limb into your tiny hole and then slam it into you repeatedly because I love you

(Source: ourtwistedfuckingstory)

rneerkat:

automaticprocess:

rneerkat:

how to flirt with attractive people: stare at them awkwardly. once eye contact is made look away as soon as possible. repeat

Fern, this is your A game. This is how you got all them ladies right?

why are u talking to plants

queendread:

I don’t understand the USA, all your roads are straight and all your cities look like they were planned using Excel.

Everyone knows the only way to build a city is to wait until a bunch of tiny villages merge together over centuries and create a sprawling clusterfuck of winding roads that make no sense and have no street signs and are impossible to navigate unless you’ve lived there all your life.